(Cheers to the year that was and to the year that will be)
I entered 2015 in my 25th year on earth. If I am to live a hundred years, it’s my quarter life. I define the stage as the impertinence of meaning related questions-queries about the long term implications of things because such never left my mind. Nevertheless, the greatest thing I’ve learned is that I knew little of things I ought to know. That knowledge brought me back to scratch and see new promising beginnings.
Our greatest fear should not be of failure, But at succeeding at something that doesn’t really matter.
Knowing so little seemed to slow me down. I had to seriously stop from all things I’ve been used to and distance myself from people and thins I’ve been attached to, upon realizing- I’ve gone so aimless that I may end up winning at things that doesn’t really matter to me. It was not in my intention to get sick, be far from friends and let go of a good source of income and all intentionally. Out of all that, I decided to abandon the place where I was onset of the year that was. I didn’t know any better option. I lost two loved ones in a month where flowers bloom, right after resigning. My sister had to resign also from work. I refused to call ‘suffering’ as God’s will. But He let that season take place at that time. Prior to that time, everything around me looked easy except my numb heart. The year that was didn’t started so hard but it revealed hardened parts of my heart. It just took such circumstances to have my heart refined. The station of grieving is where HIS comfort, peace and love abound the most. It is where I felt undergoing a major heart surgery. It’s a reminder that He who began a good work in me will bring it to completion until His second coming (Philippians 1:3).
I wandered and learned that the beauty in it is in knowing someone, who Himself is Love found me. The deaths that happened in my family made me see my family gradually set free from bondages that bonded the clan for ages. Those losses made me more time-conscious. Life is too short to waste. The greatness of a life is never on how long it is but how well it was spent. I learned that ‘Why?’- is the most lame question one can ask God, but even if he doesn’t have to answer us- He listens. Looking back at my ‘Bakit List’ (Why List) I am humbled before such a Sovereign and loving God.
PARADOX OF FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT
To know principles of financial management is one thing, to apply them is another. It’s funny how I was able to save after getting out of a higher paying job. Imagine, I’ve known budgeting, saving and investing for years. But, it looked like I’ve only known spending since time immemorial. I am always nudged by Parable of the Talents in my quiet times during the year that was. Money management books, financial stewardship seminars, plus grace and wisdom from the Owner of all things helped me to be a better manager of His resources.
It’s hard to believe that after a long while of being an expert in splurging, I managed to budget my income daily and monthly, track my daily expenses, save and do away with so much of my wants that I don’t really need. It was never easy but God made it possible.
Hello 2016! I am already 26 years old! Come on self! Are you about Jesus just to be well founded when you found the one? It looks like it, to be honest. Although, I sincerely desire to be about Him with all I am…, I just have this bitter side of reality. Right now, it’s almost an hour before the second day of January arrive, and it feels good to be honest! I am honest, I need to be healed by Him from the core. I am encouraged by what Elisabeth Elliot said:
‘The fact that I am a woman doesn’t make me a different kind of Christian, but the fact that I am a Christian makes me a different kind of woman.’
With that being said, having a relationship with Christ will not exempt me with temptations regarding my biological clock, social pressures and my own personal weakness in flesh. If I have not disobeyed the 614 rule or take the possibility of serving HIM solo lightly- it was a product of telling HIM the things HE already knew like my feelings, infirmities and worries. Let me end this confession this verse that has proven itself true to me last year, and will surely be true this year until HE comes:
‘For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are-yet he did not sin.
Let us approach God’s throne with confidence,
so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.’
(Full article about heart confessions from 2015 is found at a separate article)
DOORS TO SERVICE
Stewardship became so much of a big deal to me last 2015. I became more conscious of how am I spending my talents. Mathew 25 became a month long devotion; And ‘The Parable of the Sheep and The Goats’ spur me to live by who I am- a sheep who has redeemed by The Shepherd. I decided that I will look at what I have and make the most of them in serving. I had the luxury of time as a part-time ESL teacher in Taguig, thus, the rest of my time was spent in certain activities of True Love Waits. I was amazed being in the Campus again for sometime and the slum one time. I didn’t have so much money but God blessed me with so much friends. Before the year ended, I was enabled to mobilize my friends to contribute time, talent and treasures for the people torn by Nona in Oriental Mindoro.
I cannot start a thing nor sustain it apart from Christ.(John 15:4) Upon reading Mark 14:1-9, I thought of having a campaign ‘Ala-eh bottle Jar’ which aims to generate fund to help send deserving Bajao youth in Batangas to school. Why should I do it? The answer is a simple ‘Why not?’ I have a God that opens doors that no one can shut and shuts doors that no one can open.(Revelations 3:7)
The gifts of the year that was makes me excited of this new-year. To brew my best year yet this 2016, requires me to yield all things to Christ completely. Hard work is a response of gratitude to His faithfulness. By His grace, I will work smart. I only have one life to spend. I don’t own 2016 or vice versa but I’ll manage it the best that I can. I will let God brew this year, so that when people take a sip of my life they will know the difference of a life He brews.